Is 2020 going to be another year that you simply “get by”?
Singer/songwriter and Beatles member, John Lennon once said: ‘life is what happens to you while you are making other plans.’
At the start of every New Year you make resolutions and set goals so that you can have the life you want. But soon the stress of life gets in the way. Your relationships, your kids, your partner’s ex, work etc. and you lose sight of your goals. The daily grind of being time poor and perpetual worry becomes overwhelming. So much so that it removes any energy for making changes to your life.
So many of my clients tell me that they seek comfort in alcohol, food and cigarettes. Such emotional crutches help in the short-term. But soon they feel weak and unfulfilled.
Most people are unaware that over and above our primary, basic needs for food, shelter and clothing, we have nine primal needs. Pay attention to getting these needs fulfilled and they’ll give you the energy, motivation and passion needed to make changes and to achieve your goals.
Research has shown that when all our needs are being met, we have a more stable, balanced and fulfilling life. That way there is less chance of our spiralling into poor mental health when life throws us a curved ball.
In the first session of the boot camp we assess your primary needs to see what is missing in your life right now. We then set goals to get them met. The first need to pay attention to is that of optimising wellbeing. Here I will give you some practical self-care tools and techniques so that you can improve your physical and mental resilience and be ready to overcome any obstacle.
My client David came to see me full of uncertainty about staying in his current work role. As I got to know him I realized that, although there were aspects of his job that he enjoyed, he sometimes felt inadequate. This caused him some stress. He also had trouble sleeping because he would sit up late at night playing X-Box games. He said ‘I wake up tired, go to work and do my best to get through the day. My main aim is getting through the day’. He told me that he used to love playing football but had given it up because he is always so tired.
I tried to get some understanding of David’s hopes and dreams for the future and what future roles would interest him. He was unclear on any of that because his brain was so focused on surviving the day.
I helped David to optimize his wellbeing – to get a decent night’s sleep and to equip him with some tools and techniques to calm down when he got stressed. Within a short space of time he was feeling a lot better and had the energy to play football again. His stress levels reduced, his mind and body re-balanced increasing his energy and creative capacity. With my help was able to create some options.
You can learn more about getting your primal needs met by reading my ‘Is the life you are living the one you planned?’
Learn some more tips on how to fulfil your New Year Resolutions